And it's out of the blue. How rarely, that seems to happen. It's almost uncharacteristic of you to say that. But I'm not saying it's a bad thing. It made me think something wrong was going on with you. That something happened to make you sad or upset.
I know it's true for both of us that neither of us needs to say anything to let the other know how each of us feel. We can read it in our faces, our gestures, our eyes. Maybe I'm by compare much more vocal. My sporadic "I love yous", my "I miss yous". I write it down. I monologue them to you at unexpected times in the night.
But maybe you're not so vocal. I get the impression there's a lot of things you're not vocal about. Sometimes I'm not even sure what you think about X or Y. The future. The sky. The clouds and dreams and fantasies.
Sometimes you scare me by how you cannot fly. That you choose to remain on the ground and man your post, fulfill your obligations, and stress about what liabilities will fall upon you next. I'm scared that I have never seen you mull on the daydreams and fantasies of what could be, and what will be, of careless romance and freedom and joy and exploration that seems to be no dream, but an achievable and destined reality I believe to be coming. It empowers me. The next chapter of my life. My greatest hopes. But what does the next chapter look like for you?
I know your goals, your passions, your career, is vastly different from my own. That is most likely what all this is. My career and livelihood gives me mind, enables me to achieve what I deserve. Nature and exploration gives me soul, enables my spirit to be clean. But love... it is what gives me purpose. Love is what makes me feel human. It is your love, your smile, your laughter and warmth, that gives me heart.
Even if you don't say it, I just hope you too let love give you wings, so you can fly away from the ground and into the clouds.
